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Worst TV Show of the Week Brought to you by the Parents Television Council WARNING: Graphic Content!!! Do NOT push play if you don't want to see the explicit video!!!

Gossip Girl on CW

After much hype, including racy promotions from the CW, the “threesome” episode of Gossip Girl (Mondays, 9:00 p.m. ET) regrettably aired on November 9^th.  Defenders of the show are quick to point out that the episode was more smoke than fire, as the threesome was largely hinted at but never really shown.  The PTC’s contention, however, has always been that the message the episode sends about sex is more harmful than the actual depiction.  Well, the November 16^th episode was worse on both counts. Viewers were shown the sexual encounter from different perspectives, and the characters debated the proper way to have a threesome.  Thus, for explicit sexual content aimed at teenage viewers, Gossip Girl has rightly been named Worst TV Show of the Week.

As the episode opens, Dan reminisces about the ménage trios he had with his girlfriend, Olivia, and his longtime friend, Vanessa.  He struts down the sidewalk, grinning like a Cheshire cat, high-fiving strangers that pass by.  In his mind, he recalls Vanessa hovering over him in lingerie.  Olivia’s face enters the frame.  They both unbutton his shirt.  Olivia and Vanessa kiss while Dan watches lustfully.  He brags about the event to his friend, Nate.

“A threesome?” Nate asks.

“Oh yeah.  Just me, Olivia, Vanessa - two girls, four boobs, one Dan Humphrey.  How awesome am I?”

“How stupid can you be?” Nate chides him.  “The third person is supposed to be a stranger.”

“But the fact that it was Vanessa is what made it so fun,” Dan contends. 

“Okay the problem is, during a threesome, there's always a two-some and a one-some going on.”

“You know what?  The one-some wasn’t so bad,” Dan admits.

“You may have enjoyed the show, but let's face it, Vanessa is very vocal.  It couldn't have been easy for Vanessa to hear all that.”

Dan counters, “You know what?  Olivia was fine.  We talked the next morning.  And so was Vanessa.  I mean I haven't really seen her all that much but I'm sure she is.”

But, of course, neither woman is fine.  The threesome breeds jealousy.  Soon, Dan calls Nate for his advice.  Nate explains, “It's post-threesome Stage One, wherein one if not both girls try to prove to the other who you belong to...You gotta prove to Olivia that you and Vanessa are just friends despite the fact that you've seen each other's business.”

Olivia, however, is convinced that Vanessa is in love with Dan and always has been.  She recalls that during the threesome Vanessa “boxed her out.”  Olivia is shown straddling Dan when Vanessa in bra and panties pushes her off, mounts Dan, and starts making out passionately with him.  

The tension between Dan, Olivia, and Vanessa spills over in the middle of rehearsals for a cabaret performance.  Blair recognizes the tension and asks, “Are you bozos having a threesome or something?Oh God, how stupid can you be?  The third person is always supposed to be a stranger.”

Some will argue that the follow-up episode explores how a threesome can destroy relationships.  It’s a cautionary tale, they’d say, and therefore perfectly acceptable for Gossip Girl’s audience of mostly teen girls.  But what other messages are young women learning?  That a threesome is a right of passage; that boys have no hang-ups about it; that the only consequence will be the girls fighting over the guy’s affection; and that anonymous, casual sex with a stranger is actually better for them…at least when it comes to group sex.

For once again corrupting its young audience with horrible messages about sex, Gossip Girl has been named Worst TV Show of the Week.

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